3 Types of People to Avoid If You're A Dreamer
The dreamers of the world have the power to create a better world as long as they don't listen to the insecure, the immature and the imbalanced!
Insecure people in your inner circle can do more damage than confident enemies from faraway. At least confidence inspires more confidence!
In my daily newsletter BIG TALK: DAILY GROWTH, I recently asked the question “Who supports your dreams?”:
The people who support your dreams might be friends and family, or complete strangers for the dreamers of the world are placed among people with no dreams of their own.
When you have big dreams, they are there for a reason. It’s because you have the patience, the resilience and the courage to keep pursuing them, even if it feels like the whole world is against you.
The world isn’t against you, of course, but the world we live in — a matrix infused with fear, disappointments and ‘broken’ dreamers — is designed to make us doubt every step of the way.
The closer you are to the finish line of achieving a big life aspiration, the more projections of doubt and fear will be thrown your way.
In the pursuit of our goals, we are bound to experience many trials and tribulations to get us to give up on that which comes directly from the heart of the Universe — hold onto your faith a little longer!
No dream is a random dream, everything’s connected.
THE PLOT TWIST!
The people that do the most damage to your ability to dream are the people closest to you — your inner circle.
Why?
Well, if you achieve all of your dreams, or even just one dream, your life will change, which means that you will change, which in turn means that your relationships will change.
All of life is change, of course, but when it comes to achieving dreams, any codependent relationships in your life will be revealed right at the point of your elevation.
Not everyone can come with you to the finish line.
Why?
Not everyone wants to dream and change and do the work to grow into a better, more aligned version capable of sustaining and achieving one’s goals. It’s a lot of work! Staying the same takes a lot less effort, even if it’s not fulfilling.
Dreamers of the world usually dream a better world into existence — a world that changes for the better with every aspiration that’s turned into reality!
The biggest dreamers have the biggest obstacles to overcome because there’s a lot at stake if you were to achieve ALL of your dreams and everyone around you knows it.
Some people do not wish to see you succeed & it’s not for the reasons you might expect…
When you’re surrounded by people who have become cynical or negative about their own dreams, it’s because they listened the many voices that whispered not so gently in their ear: “Give up, you’re worthless and your dreams are worthless, too”.
And because some people believed those voices, they would now like to get you to become the same, to believe the same stories, to let go of your inspiration and join them in the misery because they don’t want to suffer alone.
My advice to you — don’t allow them to ever break your spirit and your wings. Also, don’t take it personally!
In order to fully achieve your dreams, you (may) have to become comfortable with…
moving on your own
moving in silence
This is because even the walls have ears and those ears are just waiting for some information that they can attach themselves to in order to use it against you.
Once again, this is just one of the many flaws of the current matrix — it’s not the people around you, they don’t even remember who they are for they haven’t done the inner work to reconnect with their souls (yet).
Unfortunately, it’s precisely the people closest to you that can cause the most damage to your dreams and your resilient spirit — and the system knows this. This is why the strongest resistance and the biggest distractions (can and probably will) come from your closest bonds!
Do not despair, just keep in mind that it’s the matrix, not the people, trying to bring you down and laugh it off.
Proceed forward with caution, however, and give yourself the proper space to dream. This means take your distance from anyone who’s trying to bring you down and watch out for these 3 types of people in particular if you are serious about your dreams!
TYPE 1: INSECURE PEOPLE
Insecure people are bound to block your growth for they will project their own insecurities onto you and make you doubt your capabilities the more time you spend around them.
Insecure people cannot lift themselves up — or rather, they refuse to lift themselves up, so they always try to bring other people down “to their level”.
Insecure people tend to refuse to take accountability for their words and actions, and instead be reactive and quick to jump to conclusions.
How to spot an insecure person?
They talk about other people (they have little they’re interested in or passionate about, a strong sense of apathy has taken over their zest for life — the life force within them is replaced with complacency and a strong victim mindset)
They are obsessed with drama and gossip (they like to watch other people experience chaos, it makes them feel better about their own chaos — for them chaos is never a learning experience, but a constant that has become the norm)
They have addictive coping mechanisms (they are addicted to substances from the physical world such as alcohol, binge-eating and even drugs, or they are addicted to habits that allow them to ‘feel alive’ transiently but periodically enough to sustain them such as sex, fitness, relationships and starting new projects)
They are overly worried about their physical appearance (they are unable to look within and connect on a deeper level with themselves, which is why they expect the same of others and this is the reason they base their confidence on their external appearance — the one aspect of themselves they feel most in control of changing or maintaining)
TYPE 2: IMMATURE PEOPLE
Immature people are bound to waste your time as their primary purpose in life is to dive deep into distractions and play games.
Make no mistake — immature people will play games with you just for fun, without any concern about the emotional or mental chaos they cause you in the process.
Immature people don’t just struggle with facing themselves, to a degree they just can’t do it.
Immature people grew up with immature parents or parents that weren’t emotionally or physically there. Due to their upbringing and their life choices afterwards, they probably don’t even realise they’ve got (a lot of) inner work to do.
Immature people are simply replicating everything they’ve witnesses at home growing up and sometimes it takes a couple of generations before someone in the family line breaks free from these vicious cycles of trauma.
How to spot an immature person?
They have emotional outbursts (they are unable to regulate their own emotional health, which triggers deep feelings out of the blue — they are refusing to take full accountability of their inner child healing and carry wounds from as early as their childhood everywhere they go without realising it or refusing to accept & change it)
They feel hopeless and look for saviours to help them wherever they go (they are scared to face themselves and take accountability for their thoughts, feelings and actions; instead they deflect blame on others and choose to carry the story of being a victim, which in turn leads them to seek for someone outside of them to come and save them)
They like to complain and always look for the negative, even in positive situations (they have become addicted to their own pain and misery & have also discovered that people give them attention when they have a sob story to tell, even if there are plenty of great things happening to them)
They like instant gratification and will accept any distraction (they are aware of some of their unhealthy patterns but not to the extend where they can recognise that it’s their own actions that are hurting themselves and others — accountability is a word that they’ve heard of but it doesn’t really hold much value in their own little world)
TYPE 3: IMBALANCED PEOPLE
Imbalanced people are a little bit more difficult to spot! They can be quite the chameleons and hold characteristics of both insecure and immature people, especially when they’re having a bad day.
Imbalanced people are bound to confuse you with their own confusion and drain you energetically in the long run.
Much like insecure and immature people, imbalanced people like to be part of a group. They get emotionally and mentally regulated when they can outsource the “inner work” to others.
But unlike insecure and immature people, imbalanced people have done some inner work and now they’ve gotten stuck in an impossible position. Their life is like a vortex that just keeps sending the wrong signals to the Universe: their inner compass gives them mixed signals, most likely due to blocked intuition.
Their actions have little to do with the outside world — they are fighting their own inner battles. But if you’re in their vicinity, or they are in yours, your inner compass might experience interruptions as well (much like a magnetic field that has something external blocking it), which could result in re-directing your North Star in a completely different direction and cause unnecessary delays to your own path to success.
How to spot an imbalanced person?
They cross your boundaries — repeatedly (they are terrified to spend time on their own because it will give them the time and space to further face their own shadow self and insecurities, and so they try to pry into other people’s personal space as a way to “come and save” them, which works as a coping mechanism for them not to continue doing their own inner work)
They act as Mother Theresa, the loving and accepting Cosmic Mother that gives and gives and gives (they are overcompensating for the lack of support and love they feel from their most trusted people, but instead of taking accountability for being their own best friend, these people remain in friendships and relationships that continue to give them a training ground for giving but never truly receiving it back)
They have narcissistic and manipulative patterns of behaviour (they understand how the human psyche works to an extend and due to their increased awareness, they might “test” their abilities to get what they want at the expense of other people, which ultimately has more to do with their own struggles opposed to wanting to use or hurt others, but they often end up doing just that)
BONUS TYPE: BITTER PEOPLE
Bitter people are the people who once had dreams and abandoned them.
Why are bitter people dangerous to have around you when you’re working on your dreams?
Simply put, they will feel like poison to your soul, constantly delivering attacks to your self-esteem and ability to visualise a brighter future.
Let bitter people enjoy the bitter taste as you embrace the sweetness of life!
THE BOTTOM LINE...
Here’s the thing about dreams, and goals, and aspirations. They don’t necessarily have an expiration date, but you do.
You have a certain amount of time to live. In this brief period of existence, it’s up to you to declare that you are the person who will achieve all of your dreams.
It’s entirely up to you to make the decision to go after your deams and back it up with consistent daily actions!
If people are committed to misunderstanding you — let them.
When you know who you are and what dreams are placed inside of you, no one can tell you who to be or how to move, unless you allow them.
